Online dating fatigue is causing more people to choose quality over quantity

Social researchers over the past decade claim that a more positive experience can be gained from dating sites that focus more on quality connections rather than an oversupply of single candidates. Whether selecting a life partner or a meal, having too many available options can be detrimental. The overabundance of choice available on casual dating sites has shown to cause dating fatigue and commitment issues among singles navigating today’s online dating world.

In his book Paradox of Choice: Why More is Less, psychologist Barry Schwartz explains how having an abundance of choices, in any realm, can increase levels of anxiety and depression, not to mention wasted time. At some point, Schwartz writes, “choice no longer liberates, but debilitates.”

Yes, there are plenty of fish in the sea. But if it is an authentic connection you are seeking, you’ll eventually have to venture outside of the shallow waters.

Quality or “slow dating” typically involves limiting how many potential love interests you’re engaging with. This can be beneficial when you’re feeling the effects of dating app fatigue or even “burnout”, notes Christie Tcharkhoutian, a licensed marriage and family therapist.

“These are all terms that have developed out of a response to the backlash that dating apps have created by providing an overwhelming number of potential choices,” she says. “Our brain on dating apps has created a binary process of choosing the right person, where you have a few seconds to decide (based on a first impression of a few photos) whether you will swipe right or left. This is more of a reflex rather than a process that utilises cognitive decision-making to see if a three-dimensional person is someone you can interact with over coffee or drinks, and if there is a connection. Dating apps, if not approached thoughtfully, can create a situation where people are overwhelmed by the number of choices, and as science tells us, when stuck in the ‘paradox of choice’ we often have a hard time choosing anybody.”

Some people do prefer and thrive with this ‘reflexive dating’, but many prosper when they have “fewer matches and an opportunity to humanize and be more reflective about the process,” says Tcharkhoutian. “Slow dating is a way to be more engaged in the process of dating rather than becoming a consumer in a buffet of people where you can pick and choose how much you like people than believe that a relationship is a co-created process between two imperfect people, in which you will change and improve with your partner. When trying to find your match, quality over quantity can sometimes be the name of the game, and what you’ll hopefully discover with the fewer quantity of people, is that every single person has value and is ‘quality’ and it’s just a matter of discovering what’s underneath the surface to see if they are someone whose internal qualities are compatible with yours.”

On Platinum Club is solely based on bringing together people who enjoy similar goals and lifestyles. Our eligibility criteria and pre-screening checks will ensure a more simple and meaningful dating experience.